This week has been a really weird week for me. I usually try not to let myself get too stressed out with school and the happenings of my day. I try not to be bothered by the people around me. This week was an epic fail! I really struggled this week to be at peace with everything going in my life.
Growing up, I was a Daddy’s girl. The older I get, I am both a Daddy’s girl and my Mother’s daughter. I love both of my parents dearly and would spend every day with them if I could! One thing I did take after my mother was her style of prayer. If you have been following my blog from day one, this will come as no surprise to you. My mom’s love for St. Therese has been passed on to me. I can remember time after time she would pray for something, ask for a sign, and soon enough, a rose would come her way. (“I will let fall a shower of roses. I will spend my heaven, doing good on earth.” –St. Therese) The rose was always her sign that her prayer had been heard.
Towards the end of this week, I prayed for a lot of things! I often feel like I am not doing enough to share Jesus with others. I also feel like I am not in a place where I can do enough to help those who are less fortunate than myself. So I prayed. I prayed for St. Therese to offer me guidance; I prayed that in everything I do for others (no matter how big or small) that it be done with love; I prayed for the FOCUS missionaries who are positively impacting the lives of college students on a daily basis; I prayed for all missions everywhere; I prayed for God to calm the storm in my heart and to let me know that everything was going to be okay. Like I often do, I asked for a sign.
Last night, my dear friend, Levi, came home from the courtwarming game where he had won Mr. UMKC. He was wearing his crown, sash, etc. and carrying a red rose. After I congratulate him and give him a hug he says to me, “For you!” and hands me the beautiful red rose, without knowing of the prayer I had said.
A sign that my prayer had been heard? I think so.
Sidenote: Therese of Lisieux is one of the patron saints of the missions, not because she ever went anywhere, but because of her special love of the missions, and the prayers and letters she gave in support of missionaries. This is reminder to all of us who feel we can do nothing, that it is the little things that keep God's kingdom growing. St. Therese, pray for us!
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Open Hands and Open Doors
The Lord answers our prayers in the most random of ways. I am learning each day not to question Him. He knows best, so I’m trusting He knows right where He wants me to be!
Let me explain…You know that Matt West song that I blogged about a couple of weeks ago? Well, I borrowed a few of his lyrics and I pray them every night before I go to bed and every morning when I wake up. “Father break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me.”
I can see where God is placing people in my life to test me and to make sure I am answering His call.
My first sign: In KC, there are people everywhere on the sides of the roads, holding up signs, asking for food, money, anything you have to give. I was on my way to the KC Free Health Clinic Friday afternoon to volunteer our services with some of my fellow Rockhurst OT/PT students. I was stopped at a red light and a woman who I swear looked just like the one in Matt West’s music video “My Own Little World” was sitting there. I thought to myself for a minute, and then remembered that I still had some food leftover in my lunchbox from that day to give her. As I handed her a Capri Sun and some peanut butter and crackers, tears began to stream down her face. She said to me, “God Bless you, child.” And I knew that God had opened that door for me.
My second sign: I was sitting in my Fieldwork Seminar class on a Tuesday morning. Just another day of OT school, except on this day we were talking about service-learning sites. My teacher began flipping through the slides and I thought to myself…How will I ever choose which one to go to? We were told to rank our sites from one to six. I didn’t even look at the names of the sites as I ranked them. As I numbered them, I asked God to place me where He wanted me. Last week, we got our site placements. I was assigned to a place called Operation Breakthrough. I couldn’t even remember what my teacher had said about this site, so I had to look it up on the Internet. As soon as their website loaded on my screen, I knew that my prayer had yet again been answered.
Operation Breakthrough was started by two nuns, Sister Clorita and Sister Berta. It is a non-profit corporation that has been in service for 40 years now as a place for child care for children of the working poor in the KC area. It started with only fifty children and now has around 600 children ages 6 weeks to 18 years old… with a waiting list!
The families that utilize Operation Breakthrough are not your average families. Let me just throw this at ya…More than 98% of the enrolled families live below the federal poverty guidelines (most far below them). About 25% of the children are homeless or near homeless, living in battered women's or homeless shelters or transitional living programs. Often they sleep on the sofas of friends or relatives, sometimes even living in cars, rundown hotels or abandoned buildings. About 25% of the children are in foster care or other placements due to abuse, neglect or other family crises. The average income of the families is $9,400.
I feel like God has blessed me with a servant’s heart. I am always looking to go on another service trip. Right now, however, I feel like I am being called to help those in my own backyard. So my prayer tonight continues…Father break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me.
I hope I never lose the desire to serve others, especially those less fortunate than myself.
Let me explain…You know that Matt West song that I blogged about a couple of weeks ago? Well, I borrowed a few of his lyrics and I pray them every night before I go to bed and every morning when I wake up. “Father break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me.”
I can see where God is placing people in my life to test me and to make sure I am answering His call.
My first sign: In KC, there are people everywhere on the sides of the roads, holding up signs, asking for food, money, anything you have to give. I was on my way to the KC Free Health Clinic Friday afternoon to volunteer our services with some of my fellow Rockhurst OT/PT students. I was stopped at a red light and a woman who I swear looked just like the one in Matt West’s music video “My Own Little World” was sitting there. I thought to myself for a minute, and then remembered that I still had some food leftover in my lunchbox from that day to give her. As I handed her a Capri Sun and some peanut butter and crackers, tears began to stream down her face. She said to me, “God Bless you, child.” And I knew that God had opened that door for me.
My second sign: I was sitting in my Fieldwork Seminar class on a Tuesday morning. Just another day of OT school, except on this day we were talking about service-learning sites. My teacher began flipping through the slides and I thought to myself…How will I ever choose which one to go to? We were told to rank our sites from one to six. I didn’t even look at the names of the sites as I ranked them. As I numbered them, I asked God to place me where He wanted me. Last week, we got our site placements. I was assigned to a place called Operation Breakthrough. I couldn’t even remember what my teacher had said about this site, so I had to look it up on the Internet. As soon as their website loaded on my screen, I knew that my prayer had yet again been answered.
Operation Breakthrough was started by two nuns, Sister Clorita and Sister Berta. It is a non-profit corporation that has been in service for 40 years now as a place for child care for children of the working poor in the KC area. It started with only fifty children and now has around 600 children ages 6 weeks to 18 years old… with a waiting list!
The families that utilize Operation Breakthrough are not your average families. Let me just throw this at ya…More than 98% of the enrolled families live below the federal poverty guidelines (most far below them). About 25% of the children are homeless or near homeless, living in battered women's or homeless shelters or transitional living programs. Often they sleep on the sofas of friends or relatives, sometimes even living in cars, rundown hotels or abandoned buildings. About 25% of the children are in foster care or other placements due to abuse, neglect or other family crises. The average income of the families is $9,400.
I feel like God has blessed me with a servant’s heart. I am always looking to go on another service trip. Right now, however, I feel like I am being called to help those in my own backyard. So my prayer tonight continues…Father break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me.
I hope I never lose the desire to serve others, especially those less fortunate than myself.
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Missing NEMO
There’s something about a “quick” trip to the bank that turns into a forty-five minute errand that makes me appreciate where I’ve come from a little more every day. I just began my third term in my Master’s program (only two left after this one!), so I came home to spend a few days with the fam. It was the last chance I would have to see them until spring break. After that, I’ll see them for Easter, a couple of weeks in between spring and summer terms, and that is it until August. (Unless they make the trip to Kansas City to come see me…hint hint) Back to my point about my “quick” trip to the bank. I absolutely love this about Monroe. I can walk in, and everyone knows my name. I don’t have to have my account number, fill out a slip, or do anything. I can simply walk up to cash my check or deposit some money, and before I know it I have stopped to visit with almost every teller, loan processor, and every loan officer in the building. I’ve even parked my Jeep at the back door, because I know that if I don’t go to the back offices… Aunt Nancy, Uncle Jeff, and Coach Buz will have a bone to pick with me for not stopping in to say hello.
The people I have met in Kansas City think this is the craziest thing they have ever heard of. They can’t believe everyone in town knows me by name. They can’t believe I’m related to 10% of the town’s population. That might be a bit of an exaggeration, or maybe not.
I love that I can walk into Holy Rosary School and although some things have been painted and a few things have been fixed up here and there since I graduated back in 2002, I feel like it’s the same place I grew to love as a kid. I love that everywhere I look I see one of my relatives, considering my Mom, sister, two aunts, and cousin all work there. And I find pride in knowing that they play such an important part in instilling good Christian values in the kids that are growing up in the community that I have grown to miss.
I love that I can walk into Monroe City Manor and see the aged faces of so many people that have been such an important part of Monroe City’s community over the years. I love that even though my Granny’s memory is fading fast, as soon as she sees me walk through the door her eyes light up, a smile spreads across her faces, and she waves a huge wave to make sure that I see her. I only wish I could see that every day. I love that as I sit down beside her, she gently grabs for my ponytail and starts to play with my hair like she has done so many times before. (Secretly, she’s one of the only people that I actually like to play with my hair.) And as I get up to leave, she tells me she loves me, kisses my cheek and asks when I will be back. I think to myself how many times in my twenty-three years of life I’ve taken those good-byes for granted. Now I hang on to them and hope that I’ll have the chance for many more.
My weekends at home go by so fast. The older I get and the longer I am away from home, the more I miss my family and long to be closer to them. I love Kansas City and the friends that I’ve made there. God has blessed me with a community of holy people, friends that I can go to Mass, Bible study, and Adoration with; friends that I can pray and love Jesus with. He has blessed me with friends that I can serve others with. These are the same people I live each day with and I am so very thankful. However, home is where my faith and story began and that is where I will end up. Come December, I will be happy to be closer to my family when I am finally finished with school.
The people I have met in Kansas City think this is the craziest thing they have ever heard of. They can’t believe everyone in town knows me by name. They can’t believe I’m related to 10% of the town’s population. That might be a bit of an exaggeration, or maybe not.
I love that I can walk into Holy Rosary School and although some things have been painted and a few things have been fixed up here and there since I graduated back in 2002, I feel like it’s the same place I grew to love as a kid. I love that everywhere I look I see one of my relatives, considering my Mom, sister, two aunts, and cousin all work there. And I find pride in knowing that they play such an important part in instilling good Christian values in the kids that are growing up in the community that I have grown to miss.
I love that I can walk into Monroe City Manor and see the aged faces of so many people that have been such an important part of Monroe City’s community over the years. I love that even though my Granny’s memory is fading fast, as soon as she sees me walk through the door her eyes light up, a smile spreads across her faces, and she waves a huge wave to make sure that I see her. I only wish I could see that every day. I love that as I sit down beside her, she gently grabs for my ponytail and starts to play with my hair like she has done so many times before. (Secretly, she’s one of the only people that I actually like to play with my hair.) And as I get up to leave, she tells me she loves me, kisses my cheek and asks when I will be back. I think to myself how many times in my twenty-three years of life I’ve taken those good-byes for granted. Now I hang on to them and hope that I’ll have the chance for many more.
My weekends at home go by so fast. The older I get and the longer I am away from home, the more I miss my family and long to be closer to them. I love Kansas City and the friends that I’ve made there. God has blessed me with a community of holy people, friends that I can go to Mass, Bible study, and Adoration with; friends that I can pray and love Jesus with. He has blessed me with friends that I can serve others with. These are the same people I live each day with and I am so very thankful. However, home is where my faith and story began and that is where I will end up. Come December, I will be happy to be closer to my family when I am finally finished with school.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Scooter
Today, I got out of bed like I would any other day. Before I got very far into my morning routine, I got news from my Pops that the horse my family had owned for over 25 years had died in the night. He said she died peacefully in a stall, because he could tell that she was not feeling well the last few days. Anyone who knows my family knows that Scooter was more than just a horse or a family pet to us.
When my Dad lost his leg in a farm accident many many years ago, Scooter was one of the things that helped him through. You know the saying that a dog is a man’s best friend? Well, in my family’s world, a horse is a man’s best friend. We’ve seen it every single day of our lives.
The Quincy Herald Whig even wrote an Article about my Dad and his business a few years ago. In the article, he talks about his accident and Scooter. This is what it said:
“Beloved Horses Helped Monroe City Man During Trying Times”
from the Quincy Herald-Whig, November 15, 2006
"It gave me a peace of mind to know I could still do something," he said. Long lost his leg after having it pinned to a cattle pen with the bucket of a tractor. His doctor had told him he'd be able to do everything he'd done before the accident. "But there was this little doubt in my mind," Long said. "Being able to get up on her and having the confidence to do what I'd done before…it helped on the road to recovery."
We all knew this day would come. We’ve talked about it for years. This summer Pops told us that he didn’t think Scooter would make it through the winter. However, nothing in the world could have prepared me for this day. She has been with our family since she was six months old. She would have been 27 in April. Dad was right. I should have known, because he knew her best.
It’s been a great ride pretty girl. You’ve provided us with some great memories. Rest in peace Scooter baby. We love you and miss you.
When my Dad lost his leg in a farm accident many many years ago, Scooter was one of the things that helped him through. You know the saying that a dog is a man’s best friend? Well, in my family’s world, a horse is a man’s best friend. We’ve seen it every single day of our lives.
The Quincy Herald Whig even wrote an Article about my Dad and his business a few years ago. In the article, he talks about his accident and Scooter. This is what it said:
“Beloved Horses Helped Monroe City Man During Trying Times”
from the Quincy Herald-Whig, November 15, 2006
"It gave me a peace of mind to know I could still do something," he said. Long lost his leg after having it pinned to a cattle pen with the bucket of a tractor. His doctor had told him he'd be able to do everything he'd done before the accident. "But there was this little doubt in my mind," Long said. "Being able to get up on her and having the confidence to do what I'd done before…it helped on the road to recovery."
We all knew this day would come. We’ve talked about it for years. This summer Pops told us that he didn’t think Scooter would make it through the winter. However, nothing in the world could have prepared me for this day. She has been with our family since she was six months old. She would have been 27 in April. Dad was right. I should have known, because he knew her best.
It’s been a great ride pretty girl. You’ve provided us with some great memories. Rest in peace Scooter baby. We love you and miss you.
Friday, February 4, 2011
My own little world.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9Yasgzjc0w
This song speaks to me in so many ways. I had the opportunity to see Matt West in concert this past fall and this song has challenged me to think about others outside my own little world.
In my own little world it hardly ever rains
I’ve never gone hungry, always felt safe
I got some money in my pocket, shoes on my feet
In my own little world
Population me
I try to stay awake through Sunday morning church
I throw a twenty in the plate but I never give ’til it hurts
and I turn off the news when I don’t like what I see
it’s easy to do when it’s
population me
What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
outside my own little world, ooo
Stopped at the red light, looked out my window
I saw a cardboard sign said “Help this homeless widow”
Just above that sign was the face of a human
I thought to myself, “God, what have I been doing?”
So I rolled down the window and I looked her in the eye
Oh how many times have I just passed her by
I gave her some money then I drove on through
in my own little world there’s
Population two, woah
What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
outside my own little world, ooo
my own little world, ooo
Wo-a-oh x3
yeah-ah
Father break my heart for what breaks Yours
give me open hands and open doors
put Your light in my eyes and let me see
that my own little world is not about me
What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
I don't wanna miss what matters
I wanna be reachin' out
Show me the greater purpose
So I can start livin' right now
outside my own little world, (yeah)ooo
my own little world, (yeah),yeah, yeah
my own little world, ooo
This song speaks to me in so many ways. I had the opportunity to see Matt West in concert this past fall and this song has challenged me to think about others outside my own little world.
In my own little world it hardly ever rains
I’ve never gone hungry, always felt safe
I got some money in my pocket, shoes on my feet
In my own little world
Population me
I try to stay awake through Sunday morning church
I throw a twenty in the plate but I never give ’til it hurts
and I turn off the news when I don’t like what I see
it’s easy to do when it’s
population me
What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
outside my own little world, ooo
Stopped at the red light, looked out my window
I saw a cardboard sign said “Help this homeless widow”
Just above that sign was the face of a human
I thought to myself, “God, what have I been doing?”
So I rolled down the window and I looked her in the eye
Oh how many times have I just passed her by
I gave her some money then I drove on through
in my own little world there’s
Population two, woah
What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
outside my own little world, ooo
my own little world, ooo
Wo-a-oh x3
yeah-ah
Father break my heart for what breaks Yours
give me open hands and open doors
put Your light in my eyes and let me see
that my own little world is not about me
What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
I don't wanna miss what matters
I wanna be reachin' out
Show me the greater purpose
So I can start livin' right now
outside my own little world, (yeah)ooo
my own little world, (yeah),yeah, yeah
my own little world, ooo
Thursday, February 3, 2011
Things to remember along the way...
"All I can say is, it's worth the struggle to discover who you really are and how you, in your own way, can put life together as something that means a lot to you."
- from Life's Journey's According to Mister Rogers
[a present from my dear friend Alex Roznowski]
- from Life's Journey's According to Mister Rogers
[a present from my dear friend Alex Roznowski]
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
To my Godchildren: Brock, Olivia, and Macy,
Brock, Olivia and Macy,
I love you every day.
Let me start by saying that I am so very lucky to be a Godmother. At the age of 18, I was asked to be a Godmother. Twice. I was beyond honored. At the age of 22, I was asked again. So here I am, 23 years old, with God's beautiful children looking up to me.
Brock Gregory :)
Olivia Anne :)
Macy Lynne :)
I have been thinking a lot lately about my Godchildren. Don’t get me wrong, I think about them and pray for them every single day. With the 38th anniversary of the Roe vs. Wade decision to legalize abortion passing recently, I have realized even more so just how blessed I am to have them in my life. Not only did I survive Roe vs. Wade, so did they. And I am thankful.
As I grow each day in my journey with Christ I am always searching to know more about the Catholic Church. Not only that, I am striving daily to be a living example of what it means to be a Christian to the people I come into contact with each day. I don’t always succeed. That’s what makes me human. I get up each day, and try again.
The past two days have been snow days, so I have had some free time to look into the history of Godparents in the Catholic Church, the role of the Godparent, etc. This is what I came up with, and some of the things that touched my heart the most.
As Godparents, we have the obligation to evangelize. According to Canon Law: 11. Before all others, parents are bound to form their children, by word and example, in faith and in Christian living. The same obligation binds godparents and those who take the place of parents. (Canon 774.2)
The Role of the Godparent: “The principal responsibility of a godparent is to give witness to the Catholic faith by his words and actions. When it concerns a child, he or she must be ready to accept the responsibility of being a part of the godchild's life for the remaining of his/her life. A godparent must have his eyes fixed on the Lord, believing that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. [Jn. 14:6] Not only must he believe it, he must be prepared to share his belief with his godchild. Within reason, a godparent must be available to his godchild on a continuous basis. He must have a special interest in the spiritual growth of the child.
Wow, I was blown away. Yes, I knew the responsibilities that were placed upon me each time I was asked to be a Godparent. After reading these words over and over I am even more excited about the responsibilities that have been placed in my hand.
My mom always told me her only real goal in life was to meet all of her children and their families in heaven some day. Until I have a family of my own (God-willing), I have made that a goal of my own – to meet all of my family in heaven someday. Ever since I have became a Godmother four and a half years ago, a new goal has been added. My goal is to see to it that my Godchildren make it to heaven
As I write this blog, I am reminded of my own Godparents, my Aunt Joan and Uncle Donnie. I cannot even begin to put into words how they have helped me in my journey. They are living examples of what it means to be Christ to others. They love and give with everything they have. In my heart I know that when my parents chose them for me, they had all of those things listed above in mind. My parents knew they were choosing the very best for me!
I can’t help but think of my proxy Godparents, who stood in for Joan and Donnie on the day of my Baptism. We lived in Colorado at the time. My parents chose Ken and Jean to stand in on that day. They grew to be longtime family friends, and Ken lost his battle with Leukemia this Christmas. The last time I saw him was the summer of 2007, I believe.
Rest In Peace, Ken. I hope to see you in heaven someday!
I have truly been blessed with Christian examples, and I plan on doing the best I can so that my Godchildren have this in their life. In my high school yearbook senior year, we were asked to choose a quote to put next to our picture. The quote I chose was this: “Live your life in such a way that there will be no regrets if someone were to follow in your footsteps.” Funny how that quote comes to my mind almost daily.
I love you Brock, Olivia and Macy.
I love you every day.
Let me start by saying that I am so very lucky to be a Godmother. At the age of 18, I was asked to be a Godmother. Twice. I was beyond honored. At the age of 22, I was asked again. So here I am, 23 years old, with God's beautiful children looking up to me.
Brock Gregory :)
Olivia Anne :)
Macy Lynne :)
I have been thinking a lot lately about my Godchildren. Don’t get me wrong, I think about them and pray for them every single day. With the 38th anniversary of the Roe vs. Wade decision to legalize abortion passing recently, I have realized even more so just how blessed I am to have them in my life. Not only did I survive Roe vs. Wade, so did they. And I am thankful.
As I grow each day in my journey with Christ I am always searching to know more about the Catholic Church. Not only that, I am striving daily to be a living example of what it means to be a Christian to the people I come into contact with each day. I don’t always succeed. That’s what makes me human. I get up each day, and try again.
The past two days have been snow days, so I have had some free time to look into the history of Godparents in the Catholic Church, the role of the Godparent, etc. This is what I came up with, and some of the things that touched my heart the most.
As Godparents, we have the obligation to evangelize. According to Canon Law: 11. Before all others, parents are bound to form their children, by word and example, in faith and in Christian living. The same obligation binds godparents and those who take the place of parents. (Canon 774.2)
The Role of the Godparent: “The principal responsibility of a godparent is to give witness to the Catholic faith by his words and actions. When it concerns a child, he or she must be ready to accept the responsibility of being a part of the godchild's life for the remaining of his/her life. A godparent must have his eyes fixed on the Lord, believing that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. [Jn. 14:6] Not only must he believe it, he must be prepared to share his belief with his godchild. Within reason, a godparent must be available to his godchild on a continuous basis. He must have a special interest in the spiritual growth of the child.
Wow, I was blown away. Yes, I knew the responsibilities that were placed upon me each time I was asked to be a Godparent. After reading these words over and over I am even more excited about the responsibilities that have been placed in my hand.
My mom always told me her only real goal in life was to meet all of her children and their families in heaven some day. Until I have a family of my own (God-willing), I have made that a goal of my own – to meet all of my family in heaven someday. Ever since I have became a Godmother four and a half years ago, a new goal has been added. My goal is to see to it that my Godchildren make it to heaven
As I write this blog, I am reminded of my own Godparents, my Aunt Joan and Uncle Donnie. I cannot even begin to put into words how they have helped me in my journey. They are living examples of what it means to be Christ to others. They love and give with everything they have. In my heart I know that when my parents chose them for me, they had all of those things listed above in mind. My parents knew they were choosing the very best for me!
I can’t help but think of my proxy Godparents, who stood in for Joan and Donnie on the day of my Baptism. We lived in Colorado at the time. My parents chose Ken and Jean to stand in on that day. They grew to be longtime family friends, and Ken lost his battle with Leukemia this Christmas. The last time I saw him was the summer of 2007, I believe.
Rest In Peace, Ken. I hope to see you in heaven someday!
I have truly been blessed with Christian examples, and I plan on doing the best I can so that my Godchildren have this in their life. In my high school yearbook senior year, we were asked to choose a quote to put next to our picture. The quote I chose was this: “Live your life in such a way that there will be no regrets if someone were to follow in your footsteps.” Funny how that quote comes to my mind almost daily.
I love you Brock, Olivia and Macy.
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