Ash Wednesday

I'm not going to lie. I was a little giddy about Lent starting this year. Maybe it's because I have never been at this point in my faith life... I'm not really sure.

I started off my Ash Wednesday with the children's Mass from my Alma Mater - Holy Rosary. My home parish. I love going to Mass there. After Mass, I went to get my haircut. This was scheduled, but it wasn't until I walked in the door that I decided exactly what I was going to do. I've been going back and forth about whether or not I was going to just get a trim or actually get a significant amount of hair cut off. I sat down in the chair and my beautician, Amy, asked me what the plan was. I asked her if I had enough hair to donate to locks of love. She measured, put the rubber bands in my hair, asked me if I was sure, and chopped away.

So here it is, my Lenten Journey starting off the way Jesus wants it to. Locks of Love was calling my name this morning. I know He has big things planned for me and this was just the start of it. I can't wait to see the transformations that will take place in people's lives this Lenten season. Every day I wake up and thank God that He has blessed me with holy people who challenge me to love him more. So on this Ash Wednesday, I am praying for all of those people, that they may experience Christ this Lent in a way they never have before. And as my dear friend always tells us... Saints run in packs. I believe you are right. And I hope you are reading this :)

This is how long it was before.. :)

10 whole inches!

A Continuation to my Bucket List

To see the first part, refer to my post on:
MONDAY, NOVEMBER 23, 2009

Sadly, I have only crossed one thing off that list: It was #36) Run a half-marathon. My goal time was under 2 hours. I ran it in 1:57:46. And, two Olympic medalists (Jackie Joyner Kersee & Caren Kemner) were at the finish line to give me my medal as I crossed it. May 2010.

Since then, I’ve added some things to my Bucket List. They are as follows. AND, I’ve already crossed a couple of them off ;)

44. Read 100 books I have not read before
45.Take one picture a day for 365 days of something beautiful.
46. Turn my blog into a book.
47. Volunteer with the Little Sisters of the Poor while I am in Kansas City.
48. Run the Kansas City Marathon (or any marathon, if not that one)
49. Take a Dance Class
50. Become more involved in the Church.
51. Send someone I care about flowers just because.
52. Write a letter to my godchildren once a month and put them in a book for them to have later in their lifetime.
53. Become unforgettable (but not for myself --for truly making a change in the world for the One who put me here in the first place.)
54. Learn about the saints (this is in process :) ).
55. Read the Bible, front to back.
56. Make a list of 101 things that make me happy!
57. Do a walk/run for a cause (every year).
58. Use some of my own pictures for household decor.
59. Take a self defense class.
60. Send a Care package to a Soldier (in addition to my brothers and sister-in-law)

A Single Red Rose

This week has been a really weird week for me. I usually try not to let myself get too stressed out with school and the happenings of my day. I try not to be bothered by the people around me. This week was an epic fail! I really struggled this week to be at peace with everything going in my life.

Growing up, I was a Daddy’s girl. The older I get, I am both a Daddy’s girl and my Mother’s daughter. I love both of my parents dearly and would spend every day with them if I could! One thing I did take after my mother was her style of prayer. If you have been following my blog from day one, this will come as no surprise to you. My mom’s love for St. Therese has been passed on to me. I can remember time after time she would pray for something, ask for a sign, and soon enough, a rose would come her way. (“I will let fall a shower of roses. I will spend my heaven, doing good on earth.” –St. Therese) The rose was always her sign that her prayer had been heard.

Towards the end of this week, I prayed for a lot of things! I often feel like I am not doing enough to share Jesus with others. I also feel like I am not in a place where I can do enough to help those who are less fortunate than myself. So I prayed. I prayed for St. Therese to offer me guidance; I prayed that in everything I do for others (no matter how big or small) that it be done with love; I prayed for the FOCUS missionaries who are positively impacting the lives of college students on a daily basis; I prayed for all missions everywhere; I prayed for God to calm the storm in my heart and to let me know that everything was going to be okay. Like I often do, I asked for a sign.

Last night, my dear friend, Levi, came home from the courtwarming game where he had won Mr. UMKC. He was wearing his crown, sash, etc. and carrying a red rose. After I congratulate him and give him a hug he says to me, “For you!” and hands me the beautiful red rose, without knowing of the prayer I had said.

A sign that my prayer had been heard? I think so.

Sidenote: Therese of Lisieux is one of the patron saints of the missions, not because she ever went anywhere, but because of her special love of the missions, and the prayers and letters she gave in support of missionaries. This is reminder to all of us who feel we can do nothing, that it is the little things that keep God's kingdom growing. St. Therese, pray for us!

Open Hands and Open Doors

The Lord answers our prayers in the most random of ways. I am learning each day not to question Him. He knows best, so I’m trusting He knows right where He wants me to be!

Let me explain…You know that Matt West song that I blogged about a couple of weeks ago? Well, I borrowed a few of his lyrics and I pray them every night before I go to bed and every morning when I wake up. “Father break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me.”

I can see where God is placing people in my life to test me and to make sure I am answering His call.

My first sign: In KC, there are people everywhere on the sides of the roads, holding up signs, asking for food, money, anything you have to give. I was on my way to the KC Free Health Clinic Friday afternoon to volunteer our services with some of my fellow Rockhurst OT/PT students. I was stopped at a red light and a woman who I swear looked just like the one in Matt West’s music video “My Own Little World” was sitting there. I thought to myself for a minute, and then remembered that I still had some food leftover in my lunchbox from that day to give her. As I handed her a Capri Sun and some peanut butter and crackers, tears began to stream down her face. She said to me, “God Bless you, child.” And I knew that God had opened that door for me.

My second sign: I was sitting in my Fieldwork Seminar class on a Tuesday morning. Just another day of OT school, except on this day we were talking about service-learning sites. My teacher began flipping through the slides and I thought to myself…How will I ever choose which one to go to? We were told to rank our sites from one to six. I didn’t even look at the names of the sites as I ranked them. As I numbered them, I asked God to place me where He wanted me. Last week, we got our site placements. I was assigned to a place called Operation Breakthrough. I couldn’t even remember what my teacher had said about this site, so I had to look it up on the Internet. As soon as their website loaded on my screen, I knew that my prayer had yet again been answered.

Operation Breakthrough was started by two nuns, Sister Clorita and Sister Berta. It is a non-profit corporation that has been in service for 40 years now as a place for child care for children of the working poor in the KC area. It started with only fifty children and now has around 600 children ages 6 weeks to 18 years old… with a waiting list!

The families that utilize Operation Breakthrough are not your average families. Let me just throw this at ya…More than 98% of the enrolled families live below the federal poverty guidelines (most far below them). About 25% of the children are homeless or near homeless, living in battered women's or homeless shelters or transitional living programs. Often they sleep on the sofas of friends or relatives, sometimes even living in cars, rundown hotels or abandoned buildings. About 25% of the children are in foster care or other placements due to abuse, neglect or other family crises. The average income of the families is $9,400.

I feel like God has blessed me with a servant’s heart. I am always looking to go on another service trip. Right now, however, I feel like I am being called to help those in my own backyard. So my prayer tonight continues…Father break my heart for what breaks Yours. Give me open hands and open doors. Put Your light in my eyes and let me see that my own little world is not about me.

I hope I never lose the desire to serve others, especially those less fortunate than myself.

Missing NEMO

There’s something about a “quick” trip to the bank that turns into a forty-five minute errand that makes me appreciate where I’ve come from a little more every day. I just began my third term in my Master’s program (only two left after this one!), so I came home to spend a few days with the fam. It was the last chance I would have to see them until spring break. After that, I’ll see them for Easter, a couple of weeks in between spring and summer terms, and that is it until August. (Unless they make the trip to Kansas City to come see me…hint hint) Back to my point about my “quick” trip to the bank. I absolutely love this about Monroe. I can walk in, and everyone knows my name. I don’t have to have my account number, fill out a slip, or do anything. I can simply walk up to cash my check or deposit some money, and before I know it I have stopped to visit with almost every teller, loan processor, and every loan officer in the building. I’ve even parked my Jeep at the back door, because I know that if I don’t go to the back offices… Aunt Nancy, Uncle Jeff, and Coach Buz will have a bone to pick with me for not stopping in to say hello.

The people I have met in Kansas City think this is the craziest thing they have ever heard of. They can’t believe everyone in town knows me by name. They can’t believe I’m related to 10% of the town’s population. That might be a bit of an exaggeration, or maybe not.

I love that I can walk into Holy Rosary School and although some things have been painted and a few things have been fixed up here and there since I graduated back in 2002, I feel like it’s the same place I grew to love as a kid. I love that everywhere I look I see one of my relatives, considering my Mom, sister, two aunts, and cousin all work there. And I find pride in knowing that they play such an important part in instilling good Christian values in the kids that are growing up in the community that I have grown to miss.

I love that I can walk into Monroe City Manor and see the aged faces of so many people that have been such an important part of Monroe City’s community over the years. I love that even though my Granny’s memory is fading fast, as soon as she sees me walk through the door her eyes light up, a smile spreads across her faces, and she waves a huge wave to make sure that I see her. I only wish I could see that every day. I love that as I sit down beside her, she gently grabs for my ponytail and starts to play with my hair like she has done so many times before. (Secretly, she’s one of the only people that I actually like to play with my hair.) And as I get up to leave, she tells me she loves me, kisses my cheek and asks when I will be back. I think to myself how many times in my twenty-three years of life I’ve taken those good-byes for granted. Now I hang on to them and hope that I’ll have the chance for many more.

My weekends at home go by so fast. The older I get and the longer I am away from home, the more I miss my family and long to be closer to them. I love Kansas City and the friends that I’ve made there. God has blessed me with a community of holy people, friends that I can go to Mass, Bible study, and Adoration with; friends that I can pray and love Jesus with. He has blessed me with friends that I can serve others with. These are the same people I live each day with and I am so very thankful. However, home is where my faith and story began and that is where I will end up. Come December, I will be happy to be closer to my family when I am finally finished with school.

Scooter

Today, I got out of bed like I would any other day. Before I got very far into my morning routine, I got news from my Pops that the horse my family had owned for over 25 years had died in the night. He said she died peacefully in a stall, because he could tell that she was not feeling well the last few days. Anyone who knows my family knows that Scooter was more than just a horse or a family pet to us.

When my Dad lost his leg in a farm accident many many years ago, Scooter was one of the things that helped him through. You know the saying that a dog is a man’s best friend? Well, in my family’s world, a horse is a man’s best friend. We’ve seen it every single day of our lives.

The Quincy Herald Whig even wrote an Article about my Dad and his business a few years ago. In the article, he talks about his accident and Scooter. This is what it said:

“Beloved Horses Helped Monroe City Man During Trying Times”

from the Quincy Herald-Whig, November 15, 2006

"It gave me a peace of mind to know I could still do something," he said. Long lost his leg after having it pinned to a cattle pen with the bucket of a tractor. His doctor had told him he'd be able to do everything he'd done before the accident. "But there was this little doubt in my mind," Long said. "Being able to get up on her and having the confidence to do what I'd done before…it helped on the road to recovery."

We all knew this day would come. We’ve talked about it for years. This summer Pops told us that he didn’t think Scooter would make it through the winter. However, nothing in the world could have prepared me for this day. She has been with our family since she was six months old. She would have been 27 in April. Dad was right. I should have known, because he knew her best.

It’s been a great ride pretty girl. You’ve provided us with some great memories. Rest in peace Scooter baby. We love you and miss you.

My own little world.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9Yasgzjc0w

This song speaks to me in so many ways. I had the opportunity to see Matt West in concert this past fall and this song has challenged me to think about others outside my own little world.



In my own little world it hardly ever rains
I’ve never gone hungry, always felt safe
I got some money in my pocket, shoes on my feet
In my own little world
Population me

I try to stay awake through Sunday morning church
I throw a twenty in the plate but I never give ’til it hurts
and I turn off the news when I don’t like what I see
it’s easy to do when it’s
population me

What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
outside my own little world, ooo


Stopped at the red light, looked out my window
I saw a cardboard sign said “Help this homeless widow”
Just above that sign was the face of a human
I thought to myself, “God, what have I been doing?”
So I rolled down the window and I looked her in the eye
Oh how many times have I just passed her by
I gave her some money then I drove on through
in my own little world there’s
Population two, woah

What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now
outside my own little world, ooo
my own little world, ooo

Wo-a-oh x3
yeah-ah

Father break my heart for what breaks Yours
give me open hands and open doors
put Your light in my eyes and let me see
that my own little world is not about me

What if there’s a bigger picture
what if I’m missing out
What if there’s a greater purpose
I could be living right now

I don't wanna miss what matters
I wanna be reachin' out
Show me the greater purpose
So I can start livin' right now
outside my own little world, (yeah)ooo
my own little world, (yeah),yeah, yeah
my own little world, ooo